So Emily is now officially 1 week old, I did think about getting a cake sorted out for mum & dad to celebrate but frankly I was too tired, and her poor mum is exhausted . I think we knew or thought we knew that it was going to be a lot of sleepless nights but I don’t think that we realised nor were we told about the emotional effect as well.

Emily as it turns out is more of  a grazer than a gooner when it comes to her food, keeps the wind down but means that meal times turn into hours and very long sleepless nights. It seems that midnight is the ideal time for her to wake and start eating… meal time seems to be till 4:30am…. I’m starting to worry that our daughter will become a socialite that expects meals to last for hours and include witty conversation and insightful comments… well, eventually.

Outside of meal times we obviously have the other end to deal with, they seem to be coming thick & fast and I’m thinking about starting a table / chart of nappy speed records, perhaps open it up to all comers or maybe just have a Star in a nappy change competition. It really is becoming a bit of  a pit stop exercise, the prep work is really quite in depth, the new nappy is fully prepared and opened for the fast and effective placement, the nappy bin lid is opened ready to take the pre-owned nappy, the wipes are soaked ready for use…. and we’re off!

Between the flailing arms and legs, the gurgles and screams I usually start thing think of ear plugs & safety glasses, it’s only a matter of time before I think I get caught mid change with a sneak attack. Anyway, old nappy off, there is that small period of time when you marvel at the sheer volume of what a person this small has produced, then of course you hear the advice from the midwife in your head in a kind of Obe Wan Kenobi way… ‘is it heavy?’.. eh?.. oh yes, did she have a pee?.. knowing that junior is producing urine is an important element of tracking things, what goes in must come out etc so this becomes an obsession, you’ll find yourself looking at soiled nappies and trying to tell if it’s just one or the other or both. For the innocent bystander not knowing what your doing that I’m sure cold like rather disturbing… they don’t warn you about that at antenatal classes!

It’s not long in the week when you realise that you have in fact only had 3 hrs sleep in the last 48-60hrs and that all of a sudden you can no longer lift your arms, focus on small things like your TV or the wall!  This it seems can only be fixed by indulging in that fabled past time of sleep. People keep telling us, sleep when the baby sleeps… yeah well, that only works if the baby does sleep!… plus when junior does finally sleep it’s so quiet that you spend most of your time looking at them and thinking… awe they are so peaceful, what a wee angel, or hmm… is she breathing?… I’m sure it’s paranoia and the fact that she’s new, and of course we’re new to this but I do find myself sneaking up to the crib and just leaning over to check for breathing, which is dumb as we’ve got a monitor and one of those movement boards that you put in the crib or cot that sends out a piercing alarm should junior get comfortable and not move enough. The Engineer in me knows that we’ll get a chunk of ‘false calls’ when it goes off and junior is just sound a sleep, well till the alarm goes off… then the parent in me thinks, hey I’ll take every precaution I can to make sure she’s ok… and let mum & me relax and get some sleep.. I’ll keep you posted on that.

So… 1 week in, it’s still fantastic, the magic of it all far out ways the tiredness and the constant checks and ponderings on if I’m doing it right (usually ok as mother supervises me well). I just know however when Emily looks up at me she really is thinking… na Dad I’m going to have to keep this training going you still don’t have it figured out just yet……